Self Growth & Loneliness

When embarking on your self-growth journey, you go through a wealth of different emotions. But nobody prepared me for the loneliness and the changes in dynamics of my relationships.

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Seeing all the development and changes within yourself is such a beautiful feeling. Becoming more in tune with yourself, your values and what is truly for you. Liberating. Scary. Conflicting. Just a few emotions I have been feeling lately.

With growth comes outgrowing people, changes in how you view your current relationships, and the realisation that not everyone is going to be coming with you on your full journey. People who you may have felt would be in your life forever, may now feel like they're not for you. Entirely, or just not in the same capacity.

You might start to realise some of your relationships only really worked because of where you were at within your journey. But as you elevate, things start to look different. Things start to feel different. And it can be so hard to know what to do with those feelings

Do I hold on? Do I tell them how I'm feeling? Do I take a step back, or do I let go?

The reality is, not everyone is going to "get it". Your journey. The new way you show up for yourself.

But that's OK. You can't carry the weight of worrying about how other people will perceive you. It's too heavy. It's overwhelming. It leads to self doubt and not trusting your own feelings. Your intution.

Some will get it, be happy for you and stand by you. Others will also feel, conflicted, confused and taken aback. They're entitled to feel how they feel, as are you.

Growing apart from people is never easy. It's painful. It hurts like hell. Not knowing how you feel about your relationships as you grow is equally hard to navigate. Wanting to hold on to the familiarity. But not wanting to hinder your growth and continue the same patterns which now feel unhealthy.

Remember that growing is better than staying stagnant and longing for change. Make the changes. And what's meant to be for you will show itself. It will become clearer over time as you learn to trust yourself.

You have to be ready to accept that not everyone is going to vibe with you as you grow. Not everyone is going to like you with boundaries. Not everyone is going to like you putting yourself first. Not seeking their validation or acceptance. Some may resent you for this. Others will admire you. Maybe from afar. It may bring you closer to some people. Either way, acceptance is key. And how you deal with your feelings following others reactions is key.

Ty's Top Tips:

• It's okay to take a step back to process how you're feeling. It can be ALOT. One day you might feel okay, and the next feel strongly about outgrowing people. It's a journey. Take the time you need to figure out how you feel.

• Clarity is key. With yourself and with others. Be true to yourself about your feelings. This allows you to have open and honest conversations during your journey with those around you.

• Try not to feel guilty. You are not a bad person for outgrowing people and "leaving them behind" or taking a step back if thats what you feel is needed for yourself. Pay attention to your feelings. When you think about them, when you're around them, and after you have seen them.

• Outgrowing people does not always mean you need to cut them off completely - sometimes it just means the dynamics of your relationship needs to change but can still be sustained.

• Ultimately outgrowing people makes space for the those who are meant to be for you in the next chapter.

• Sometimes the feeling is mutual and things will naturally "fizzle out". Other times it may be more one sided and they may not see that things need to change. Try to have those conversations about how you are feeling to see if it is something that can be better going forward, or something that needs to be let go of.

• Trust the process. Change is so hard, but trust that everything will work out how it's meant too.

• Channel your energy into those people that do "get you" and you still feel strong connections too. Embrace the positive relationships around you.